Coffee with Titaw

Tag: Journey

  • Homeschooling is a Slog

    Homeschooling is a slog, is just an honest statement, and I believe that when we accept it for what it is, we can stop trying to make it different than what it is. According to Merriam Websters Online Dictionary, slog as a noun is defined as hard persistent work or a prolonged arduous task or effort.

    Now that is the truth of homeschooling. It is something that is difficult and must be followed through with consistency over a long period of time.  It is work and it is hard work. It equates to laundry.  It is something you do all the time.  If it is not done, the results are epic.  However, when it is completed on a regular basis, it becomes a seamless hum to the house.  I don’t know many people that would call laundry fun, or exciting.  We might have a breakthrough on getting those shirts finally white, or that crazy stain out, but most of it is just a slog.  When ten of us lived at home, I did two loads of laundry Monday through Friday, just so that I could have my weekends off from laundry.  Every day – two loads: washed, dried and put away. This was most days.  Other days, a machine broke and we had to figure out a problem, and there were those amazing days when I was ahead of schedule.  Most days were just two loads finished.

    Likewise, homeschooling.  Every day we would pursue our schedule.  Every day we did math, reading, science, writing, etc.  Every day we went to the basement took out our schedules and went to work. Some days had some bright spots – a field trip, a special movie, a surprise day off, but not very often.  Bad days came too – attitudes flared; concepts did not make sense to anyone – even the teacher.  Someone was sick.  Most days were just getting the work done.  It was the seamless hum of our days.

    When we stop trying to make homeschooling always fun, always exciting or everyday a huge lightbulb going off – we can accept it for what it is – the hard job of providing an education.  For our kids, it is the hard job of getting an education. When we know that and accept that – we can relax and get on with it.  The days then become more enjoyable because we aren’t trying to be flashy. As the seamless hum of our laundry produces great results for our household, even more so, does the seamless hum of working at education.  One day that child begins to read books, because of the time spent working on phonics. One day that child enters Algebra because of the time spent memorizing math facts.  One day, believe it or not, the job will be done.  The child will be ready to graduate and move on to the next phase of their life.  The work of educating will end and there will be more fond memories than you can see now.  You will actually finish this job.  The laundry will still be there.

  • Inspiring Reads for Your Homeschool Journey

    Maybe you are considering homeschooling.  Maybe you just need a shot in the arm during your upcoming summer break.  I have four books to recommend for your own education.

    Schole Everyday

    This book is not about homeschooling.  It is not even written particularly to homeschoolers. However, it is written by homeschoolers.  I recommend this one because it endeavors to teach moms how to educate themselves.  You cannot give what you do not have.  If you are not engaged and excited about the learning process for yourself, how can you hope to engage your children?  This book will help you see why you should be learning and how you can fit it in the margins of your day. 

    Mere Motherhood

    My favorite genre is memoir and this one is one of my favorite memoirs.  It tells her story.  To me, that was more inspiring than any prescription on how to homeschool.  She talks about educating herself and educating her children (mostly boys).  

    However Imperfectly

    This is a collection of essays/articles Andrew Pudewa has written over the years.  Even the title gave me a view of homeschooling that I love – However Imperfectly.  

    Awaking Wonder

    I enjoyed this one for the feelings it invoked.  I am not sure that she ever used a curriculum per se. The book talks about how she and her husband formed their own idea of how to educate their children, and then implemented it in their home.  Awaking Wonder is a great book for impressing the idea of getting your children full of wonder and excitement for learning instead of spoon feeding a list of facts.

    These are all books that I have read — some of them more than once. They kept me going on the homeschooling journey and gave me ideas for forward momentum. I highly recommend reading any or all of them.

  • Why Did I Choose to Homeschool

    I get asked a lot about how I decided to homeschool. It was a definite walk on a sunny day. Then it was worked out over many years. I am not sure how I heard about homeschooling in the late 90’s.  It could have been from a radio program like Focus on the Family — I listened to those a lot, but I just don’t remember.  I remember researching homeschooling when my oldest was about 3 years old.

    I had a little file folder of research that was shoved into our regular bookcase.   My husband was not sold on the idea, he was worried about socialization issues and about sports.  How would our son play sports if he wanted to?  My friend put all her kids in an in-home preschool program that was supposed to be really good.  I looked into it, but just couldn’t fill out the application.  I decided that since my daughter was only 3 we could wait another year until she was 4 to think about preschool.  I used Sesame Street magazine and did little lessons about 3 times a week.

    Silly me — I didn’t realize how many better things I was already doing.  We would go to library story times every week.  I read aloud to my children on a daily basis.  We would listen to music together a lot.  We listened to Carnival of the Animals by Saint-Saens and tried to act out all the animals as we heard them.  My son loved listening to Peter and the Wolf by Prokofiev.  We did craft projects together and we walked a lot.  We walked around our little city and visited farmer’s markets and community orchestra performances.  We went to zoos and county fairs and local festivals.  I really didn’t need a preschool at all, but I didn’t know that.

    We were out on one of our walks one day and we walked right past the local Christian school.  I realized that if I put my oldest in school, she might go there. I imagined my son and I walking her to the door and turning to walk back home.  I spent the rest of our walk choking back tears.  I wanted to take them home like this every day.  I couldn’t imagine leaving her behind at a school. That moment of time is when my homeschooling journey took root.

    When my daughter turned 4 and my son was 2 1/2 my husband decided that we could try homeschooling.  We might continue if we tried this preschool year and things went fine.  We figured that if it was awful our daughter could enroll in Kindergarten and we wouldn’t feel like she missed anything — not every kid went to preschool right? I was so excited I ordered a traditional school box of materials for K4 and off we went. 

    We have never looked back.  Those shaky beginnings were the start of our epic nearly 30 year adventure in homeschooling.  I wish I had nailed my “Why” down more than I wanted them to be at home. I wish I had known back then that a school box of materials wasn’t necessary to start. Those loving moments of music, walking, fairs, and zoos were an abundant education. I wish I knew how much they were learning in their own imaginative play – “Star Board crew” was full of homemade hats and titles for everyone — I was always “cooker”. 

    What about allaying the original fears that my husband and many others had about socialization?  Same as that silly preschool idea I had.  Living life with your children is socialization.  We went to the library, grocery store, and church.  We attended live plays and took local art classes for kids. We hung out in the park and had family friends over often. Eventually, we also got involved in nursing home ministry, community 5k’s and some of my kids played on the public school sports teams. When I look back I see that my kids were able to speak to the lady in the wheelchair at the nursing home as easily as they chatted with their peers.

    I can not really believe that 30 years have passed since that moment I realized I did want to keep them at home. I am glad I didn’t know all that the next years would hold.  Six more children, adoption processes, trauma issues, and our home being the landing spot or transition location for a few family members.  We took care of my dying mom in her last years and I flew off to help care for my brother in his last weeks. Kids graduated, kids got married, various pets came and went, we took vacations, participated in sporting events, and kept involved at our local church.  In the process of time, homeschooling just kept plugging along.

    It started with a little walk on a nice day, and a mama’s desire to spend time with her children.  All those fears of socialization melted away as we saw what God was doing in the life of our family as we stayed faithful.  My homeschooling journey took root in a moment of time and has been worked out in the process of time.

  • It’s Over, Let’s Begin

    My homeschooling years have come to an end.   In the back of my mind, I always knew that they would.  I used to tell my children that I raised them to go.  I was not pushing them out, but the point was that they would launch out and start their lives. Here we are, some 28 years later, and I am finished homeschooling all eight of them.

    They have moved on to their adult lives, and my husband and I are empty nesters. Every summer for 28 years, after a short break, I sat down with books, schedules, websites, and ideas.  I planned our school year, which never went according to plan.  Homeschooling was my full-time job.

    Something I wished for in all those years was another homeschool mom further down the road to talk to about homeschooling.  Sometimes I found an older mom to chat with; in some seasons, I did not.  One magazine that I used to read had a section titled “A Day in Our Life”.  I used to eat that article up every time it arrived. I wanted to see how other people were doing things and glean ideas for what might work in my house.

    This blog is not my day in the life anymore; it is my way of connecting with younger moms and perhaps giving them insight into 28 years of experience.

    Grab a cup of coffee and let’s begin!! .